The ideal job, a reality check.

I am in an mixed marriage. I don't mean she is black and I am white but I mean by nationality. I once had a career, albeit one that I hated and had reached total burn out. The chance to change my life and live abroad seemed a tantalizing prospect.

I once though my ideal job would be to be a matron in a girls boarding school. I would disguise myself as a matron, insert false balloon boobs and help out and supervise the after hockey shower sessions. Sadly, that never happened. I have been married, for I think, about nine years? I am not sure on the exact date that we married, it's all a blur but don't tell my wife that. I have still not yet learned my wife's language. I am trying to self teach myself but being dyslexic it ain't easy and I absolutely hate languages, they bore me. I could not read or write probably until I was about twenty two years of age. I will have to learn and later work in my wife's country or in another country if we are sent aboard again. What will I do? What is the ideal job? My world has been submerged in nappies, baby food and toys. Before I became a stay at home dad, I worked at out last country posting after leaving my UK job as a systems manager. I have been out of the world of work for so long as an employee, I don't think I could face it or even like being employed again. I don't think I could work in an office and play office games and office politics. I could not suffer the same bull shit that goes on in an office environment. I would hate it.

What would be my ideal job? A lighthouse keeper, a wine tester, a top model scout, a bed mattress tester, a sleep research volunteer, I don't know? I would like to be self employed, to blow my own trumpet, to be my own boss. The trouble is I am not alone, many people dream of having their own business or doing their own thing. I have reached the stage in life where I get excited about the price of vegetables, I compare push chairs (strollers) in the street, time for a reality check. I have become a non working housewife or 'manwife'.

I am thinking of learning a transferable skill that can be done anywhere. I am thinking of therapeutic massage. Maybe I will do it and find a massage course but I am not sure how easy it would be to find such a course, on the other hand, if you forgive the pun, not all women would be happy to have a male massage, to have a man touch them. I have been told I am good at it and enjoy it, so why not! This goes against male and female roles and the norms of society (see below). You can pay a lot for a massage and I am sure a good living can be made from it. Time dear reader, to think to the future beyond life of a stay at home dad.

Note: I hope this post (and in fact this blog) does not come across as depressed or depressive. Like anyone, I am a bit depressed at times but its more of an observation as a stay at home dad and non working expat living in Russia than a place to complain. I also enjoy writing and hope you enjoy these ramblings. Thanks.