Meet Russians - Get to know the culture

Being at home all day as an expat parent is very isolating and many expats just mix with other expats. This is all very well to make friends but you will never have a feel for the country or its culture. The best thing to do, is to teach English and get out and around the city, by teaching English, you meet so many interesting and different people. I have found simply talking to Russians, is the best way to learn about Russia. Its such a big country, deep in history and opinions. Foreigners can only imagine what life was like for Russian people 20 or 30 years ago, but we do know for sure that it was very hard for most Russain people. Life now in Moscow, seems to have changed so much. There are mega rich and consumerism and the car are king here, I don't think this is a good thing but that's another issue for discussion at another time.

Get out, travel the metro, visit places as much as you can, and talk to people. Having lived in another eastern European country for five years, I left that country with a memory and image of it that I will never forget. I hope to do the same with Russia. When I am old and in my arm chair (and hopefully not senile), I will think back to my former life and travels and remember these experiences with affection and happiness. In the west we have a negative views of Russia in relation to its past and what we see in the media. There is some truth to every story but its not all as negative as its painted, have an open mind and be ready to adapt.

I think when you visit a country, you should try the local food, listen to traditional music, make friends with the local people and live life to the full in your chosen host country. In my my case, Russia. It takes time of course and the first six months or so will be hard and an adjusting period before you feel relaxed and ready to put your toes in the waters of new experiences and cultures. My toe is now in the water and I am ready to live and enjoy.

Hair cut - Success at last

Success at last. Finally after great searching, I found a hair place that charges normal prices, I have been looking for two months. I found a place via a Russian friend near the center. Like most places in the city, it was hard to find by street number and it had no neon sign or anything to give its name, just a plain white door on a block of old flats.

I nervously went down the many stairs with my child and buggy to the hair salon. I felt like I was so near to my goal of actually getting a hair cut in Moscow and I felt nervous of what I would be told for price and that I would have to go home again without a hair cut. Once I was in the salon, I asked the lady, via help from a friend on my mobile who speaks Russian,  how much it would be and I was told 200 rubles for a hair cut. I showed the hairdresser guy, my pre-typed hair cutting instructions written in Russian and he cut it. He even washed it for an extra 90 rubles and helped me up the stairs with my child and buggy. What a nice guy.  'Wow' at last. A hair cut in a normal nice place, for 290 rubles- fantastic. One of the ladies even held and played with my son, while my hair was being cut. I think people like kids in Russia. I will certainly go back.

My advice is, if you get a hair cut as a foreigner, check the price first and if you do not speak any Russian, get a friend to type on paper how you want your hair cut so you can show the hairdresser. If they ask you if you want a shampoo or anything, check the price first before they do anything or you may get a bad shock.

Money, money, money its a rich Moscow world

I went to a shopping center today in Moscow. It was a shopping center for the mega rich Muscovite. The floors were cream marble and the shops vulgar and expensive. The place was full of fake blonds, in designer wear. These women had 4 mm of make up, pink lips, fake tans, large jelly breasts and high heels. The cars parked outside were all black and ranged from Mercedes, to BMW's. In the shopping center, two shops impressed me. One was a pet shop for very rich pets and the other a luxury food hall. In the pet shop, you could buy, diamond cat or dog collars, dog clothing and food bowls covered in fake diamonds. One bowel was priced at 700 euro. Do people really buy that kind of stuff? Yes. A woman named Olga. She is not real but a stereotype.

Picture this: a woman named Olga, aged 52 (but officially 45) , lives in a 5 bedroom house in the Moscow suburbs, husband works in oil or is it finance? she is not really sure, she has had 2 boob jobs and last year they went to Turkey to an all inclusive 5 star hotel for 3 weeks, she had sex with a waiter (he had a nice bum and white teeth) while Demetri was playing golf, but he does not know about it. Husbands too busy for her, but she has lots of credit cards, (her babies) money is no object. Cesar, her pet poodle, has a diamond dog collar and eats at the table with her and her husband in a doggy high chair, Cesar eats fine herb sausages imported from England and drinks zero fat goats milk.

Next to the pet shop, is a wonderful super market named "Globas Gourmet". Its a feast for the eye and for the stomach. Fine cheeses, Sushi freshly made, the biggest collection of whiskey I have ever seen, fine wines and everything Olga could want for that special dinner party. Up stairs, in this shopping center, you can even buy a Porsche, why not "his and hers" for our birthdays? It really is luxury. Olga drives a BMW, but its two years old time, for a change.

Moscow is a place where some people have so much money that its beyond our comprehension. We could never imagine such wealth unless of course we won the national lottery. How did they get such wealth? that's a question I often ask myself. In Moscow you can smell two things, car exhaust and money.

Forbidden fruit- Moscow

Following on from my Manopause story, I thought this one would be appropriate. Yesterday, at the metro I was about to go through the ticket barrier here in Moscow, when an attractive young girl came up to me. She spoke to me in Russian, I told her I was English so she spoke to me in broken English. She said, "I have no money" but with a sexy Russian accent it sounded like "I khave no monyee'. I let her use my ticket to go through the barrier so she could take a train. Any normal person would have done the same.

When I arrived in the pit of hell, down the huge escalator, I stopped to read the sign for the correct train, she came up to me and asked me if I needed help. I said I did and she showed me to the correct train. She then told me she had no money because she had spent all her money on a visa for Italy and had travel to Moscow to get it. I felt sorry for her and I'll be honest, lust for her. (Did I just say that!) then she said she had no where to stay or go and asked me if I was staying in a hotel or hostel, (a hostel, me, at 43 years of age). She said "I show you around where you go now" I told her I was going to teach English, she said she would come with me and wait for me at the school. She told me she came to Moscow by bus and that she lived over 1,000 km outside Moscow. I felt sorry for her but also a bit suspicious. She did not look like a prostitute, was she just foolish? This question, played on my mind.

I got on the train and she followed me and sat next to me. I tried to flash my wedding ring at her as although, I felt movements in the "forbidden zone" and the dragon began to wake, my brain was screaming "you are married", "time out"," back off". I got off at my stop and after having taken a cold mental shower, I told her I had a flat here and a wife and child but she still followed me, my brain said get thee behind me devil. Then I said to her (with a reluctant heart), bye I can't help you and I rushed away up the escalator as fast as my feet could take me. It felt like walking past a shop window full of cakes when you have no money or are on a diet. I am happy I showed good moral fortitude and threw the devil back down to hell. It hurt but was the best choice.

A sad but true story. It was a tough, but had I been 15 years younger, 8 kg lighter and single, I am sure I would have gone for it, was her story true? who knows? but maybe she was just a girl who was down on her luck, was she stupid to get into such a situation? in my opinion, yes very stupid.

Dear reader, temptation often taps us on the shoulder throughout our lives, we must be strong and say no. Did I tell my wife about it? yes I did. I continue to fight my manopause on a daily basis. Follow my manopasic journey on this blog.

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Ramblings about nothing and the "manopause"

This blog started at speed and has slow down a bit because a) I half feel I am writing to myself which was part of the idea anyway of doing it as it's a stay at home therapy and b) I have not been anywhere to write about. Life as stay at home dad is really the same most days, but I plan to change this. I am going to get a small part time job to help with the costs of living in Moscow which comes 3rd after Tokyo in money terms. I don't know why its so expensive? Russian wages are not high but a lot of things are imported. Rents are high as I have mentioned before, but then again, I think Russians try to milk foreigners for every ruble they can and they still have the idea that all foreigners have their rents paid for by their employers, which annoys me a lot.

I hope to experience the real Russia outside of my cocoon and womb existence of life in my tiny Moscow 4 X 4 flat. I aim to mix with, and meet Russians as that is the only way to get a feel of the country and the people. At Christmas, I plan to go to St. Petersburg by train for three or four days. This should be interesting. One thing I have noticed, is that Russian like children, they are not subject to smiling in the street but when I carry junior in his backpack they all look at him and smile. Children are good at creating peace and happiness in the hardest of people. I am going through the "manopause". Yes, the manopause like the menopause. This is when a man is in his early 40's, symptoms include some but not all of the following- hot sweats, an attraction to girls in their late teens and 20's, a yearning to try extreme and dangerous sports, the need to own a motorbike and any gadget and other such symptoms. There is no known cure other than a cold shower and a hobby such as stamp collecting, dominoes, insect study or cricket. I will take up all four in between housework and nappy changing.

Funny how life works out and where you end up in it. Ten years ago if anyone had said to me I would be married, with a child living in Moscow, I would have looked at them as if they were mad. Also I have learnt in life, that what is here today, may not be here tomorrow. I was once working in a gherkin factory, I worked as a Shepard in Australia and took a degree in my mid 20's and went onto to become a top manager in statistics and I hate maths. Life is funny, you can have it all and lose it or be in a situation that you can see no way out of, but later find a way out, look back and laugh about it and it becomes just a bad or good memory.

I could write to you about soft full smelly nappies, how to make soup and other such things but this would not be interesting. I could write about sex scandals and lies but I have not seen any or experienced it. But I still live in hope. My off spring is still crawling and as yet cannot walk and I ate a tuna sandwich for lunch. I hope to write later about life in Russia, my travels and experiences and I won't disappoint you dear reader. Just give me time. A blog is a blog and just for fun after all and I don't believe in airing ones dirty laundry in public, well maybe if you ask me nicely.

Ways to be happy- Part 2

In a follow up to my "ways to be happy in grey Moscow" I have been thinking deeply. Yes, I know thinking is dangerous and I am not a religious man and do not like to preach or lecture anyone but think on this then ask yourself are you happy?

1 Think of the old woman standing in the Metro who begs everyday
2 Think of the man who has no guilt and who has killed or bullied his way through his life
3 Think of the person who has never been in love or who has never been loved
4 Think of the person who has no home
5 Think of the person who has no family
6 Think of the person working in a factory who does the same job every day
7 Think of the person who has no kindness
8 Think of the person who has no food
9 Think of the person who has never had kindness to them
10 Think of the person who only hates

Now ask yourself are you happy, lucky and have you known happiness.

The lesson has ended and have a nice day, morning, afternoon or evening.

Traveling on the Moscow metro and other thoughts.

Traveling on the metro here, is an interesting but not an altogether pleasant experience. You enter the metro walking past many people drinking beer from the can, make your way past people selling, I don't know what? You walk past dogs with a bucket in their teeth, with a sign stuck on the bucket saying "feed me". You then blindly swipe your ticket on the barrier machine to get in, although you don't know how much credit you have left and make your way to the vast steep escalators.

Its kind of surreal on the escalator. They are very steep and the metro seems to swallow you up on a factory conveyor belt into the pit of hell. You can hear the dull thudding sound of the escalator machinery clanking away and have only dim lighting on your way down, few people smile or speak. Once down, you pass a man or woman that sits in a glass booth at the bottom of the escalator, who's daily job is to sit there staring up at the endless passengers on the escalator. Then you go to the platform and board your train.

The trains on the Moscow underground, are like those in the UK, in that they were new circa 1966 and have not had much done to them since then, apart from some new plastic seat coverings. If you are lucky enough to find a seat, you will have to endure the body smells of others such as bad breath, sweat or garlic. The one thing that makes up for it all here in on the Moscow metro, are the magnificent metro station platforms that are a joy to look at. They are really beautiful, although some do need a little attention and repair. We could not say same the same for the British underground system, that's is dull and just dirty. You can see why they built them the way they did in Russia, to glorify work. The escalators carry the people down into cathedrals for travel- destination work (everyone had a job). Work meant freedom and food for all, in what was communist/Socialist Russia.

Although I am not a communist or socialist, It makes me sad to see what has happened to Russia and her history. Mass consumerism and worship of the car and money have all but killed the country and her past. The only ideology left, (as in the rest of the world), is money and I have got more than you syndrome and this is now the new global religion. Russia has just joined everyone else, in my opinion its time for a world change.